Island Dave’s TOP 10 Reasons You Know You’re a Gear Whore
By
David Georges
- You have more gear in your gym bag than clothes in your closet.
- You tell friends and family that gear is for protection from injury
and support, and conveniently leave off the fact that it adds hundreds of pounds
to your total.
- Your arms and legs dramatically taper in where your gear fits - even
when you’re not wearing it…
- The lines of broken blood vessels where your gear pinches your chest,
underarms, hips and legs haven't gone away in ten years.
- You structure your max effort day by layers of added gear, and
everything after 315 is hard. You keep going anyway - adding piece by piece -
toughing it out, because you know that if you can tweak that gear just right,
you might get a 5 pound PR.
- Your favorite gear is from when you were two weight classes lighter
and you still try and see if it will fit.
- Your gear is so tight that you often black out during warm-ups
- You think that RAW stands for Really Angry Weakling.
- You have EliteFTS on speed dial, and the UPS driver just knows your
house is going to get a delivery, so he automatically starts his route there
every day.
- Dave Tate has never met you, but he sends you a Christmas card every
year thanking you for the business, while Ano Turtiainen indirectly implies that
his family vacations are somehow tied to your order frequency.
- And the bonus reason you know you’re a gear whore: You forget to put the
silent “e” at the end of words - as in: Jo (no “E”) Jordan is a fin exampl of
the consummat gear whor.
Island Dave was voted most likely to “Whore With the Gear” by his high school classmates, and after nearly 30 years of experimenting with gear from everyone including George Zangas’s original Supersuit to today’s METAL Powerlifting gear, he still doesn’t have it dialed in. If you see him on the platform, please take a moment to wish him luck in his merry adventures and don’t hesitate to help pull his straps up.
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