Just the other day I heard some really good news: there is talk of regulating the guru world from personal training to prep guys and nutritionists. I was giddy and have been waiting for this for a very long time. Of course, I read it on Facebook and I have heard talk of this in the past but without anything terribly concrete coming of it. This time it seems different. I was not surprised to see that quite a few people were vehemently opposed to it. Damn right they are – I would be too if I had no fucking clue what I was doing and was trying to make a living with no experience or credentials. Yup, this one is going to piss off a lot of people. Shocker, I know.

There is no good reason to be against regulation of this particular field. I am about as anti-government involvement as you can get, but I still think there are some things that simply need to be regulated, and this is one of them. Almost every other field has regulations and this one should be no different. People are up in arms about it because regulation means the herd will be thinned — and it has needed to be thinned for a very long time.

There are people out there that have no credentials but are damn good at what they do. I get it. I have no paper credentials myself, but have been doing what I do quite well for a very long time. Still, we are the exception to the rule because there are just too many people in this flooded sea of turds that not only don’t have any qualifications but aren’t even a legitimate tax-paying business. Over and over I tell people that if you want to be taken seriously, you need to take what you do seriously. Money usually wins out over logic and professionalism, unfortunately.

Personal Trainer At The Gym

This might sound a little rough but hear me out: If you are running a faux business and not paying taxes like the rest of us, you are an unpatriotic piece of shit. Normal United States citizens pay taxes; we don’t necessarily enjoy it but it is our duty—our obligation—as Americans to do so. When I am sitting over here making my monthly EFTPS payments and your ass is at Texas De Brazil with shawty (the cool way to say shorty – you know, your boo), pretending you’re not boojie, I’m over here pissed off, parting with hard-earned money that goes straight to the gubment (another cool way to say government — clearly you are getting a lesson on cool today). In fact, the rest of us that pay our taxes consistently and without fail, are all pissed off. Hopefully, the free ride on 24s in your incredibly cliché’ Hummer is over. (And don’t argue that Hummers aren’t cliché because they sooo are in bodybuilding.)

See, the sea of turds has been too big for too long. The people that consider this field legitimate, want it to be legitimized. We aren’t milking it for every dollar we can, we are making a living on our reputation and knowledge, feeding our kids, paying mortgages and investing. We aren’t pretending to be loaded, and we are dealing with quarterlies, keeping shareholder and director meeting minutes current, and dealing with bitchy CPAs that chastise us for trying to write off a pair of tickets to a baseball game that we swear we did business with a client. Can't a guy get a write off every now and then?

Please, regulate the hell out of this industry and not only will the legitimate trainers and prep guys be left standing, but the people that are looking for quality instruction and knowledge don’t have to sift through a sea of garbage risking getting ripped off, scammed, or possibly even worse: finding their health in imperilment.  Even if the industry doesn’t get regulated now, it will.

It will, because sooner or later someone is going to kill somebody due to their ignorance (and arrogance) and then there will be no way around regulation. Everyone knows that most times nothing gets done until someone dies or gets hurt. Enjoy that meal at Morton’s because eventually, you will either be paying taxes and running a legitimate business, or you will be finding a real job.

And, trust me, real jobs SUCK. Just sayin’.

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