A little about my Christmas this year:
I woke up to a quiet house and drank coffee in peace.
I cleaned up my dog’s puke.
I took down the tree and Christmas decorations.
My kitchen is nearly spotless.
I found a dollar in the washing machine.
I ate a few cookies.
I watched 3 Christmas movies.
I found a dead stray cat across the street. 🙁
I made my kids hotdogs for dinner on Christmas Day.
We took a slew of silly pics together.
This year’s Christmas was a bit off kilter. My kids spent Christmas Eve and most of Christmas Day with their dad and his family. My siblings and parents celebrated Christmas the weekend before because my 38 week pregnant sister was about to bust. (And good thing we celebrated then because my nephew was born Christmas night.) At 30, 35, 36, and 37, us 4 kids are still just as immature as we were when we were younger, but we all get along, respect and love each other… couldn’t ask for better siblings.
I have eluded in past training logs since April that this year has been a roller coaster of stress, in which the pinnacle was finalizing my divorce. Amongst all the crazy that’s gone on this year, I’ve come to realize a whole helluva lot about myself, who I am and what I want.
At 35, life surely isn’t easy. In fact, I don’t see it getting any easier. But what I do see is ME. A much more confident, bold, brave woman. (If you knew me years ago, or maybe even 10 months ago, you’d know what I mean.) I'm not sad or upset that this Christmas was so strange and out of whack. It's just different. And one that will be remembered for many reasons.
So while I sit here and write this, my son is crashing cars and dragons and Transformers and my daughter is making bracelets and drawing. I look at these two (8 and almost 7) and I’m flooded with emotion of who they’ve become. My kids are amazing, resilient, loving kids. And I’m left with these thoughts:
Unconditional love is probably the greatest give you can give and receive.
Change is not bad. It’s just different. It presents obstacles, but also opportunities.
Find good every day. Tears come, but then a walk with the dog, a text from a loved one, and some reflection on all that you have (and will have) in your life can bring you back.
I’ll never be perfect… never the perfect mom, or coach, or even a significant other someday… but I’ve surrounded myself with people who continue to help me grow and see who I am.
I’m convinced there is nothing more attractive than a woman who is confident in herself and her relationships.
A smile from your kid can light up a room. A hug from your kid can melt your heart. A hand-written note from your 6 year old can leave you with an indescribable joy in your heart.
Merry Christmas.
God bless the children!