I laid in bed the other night to do my nightly reading and journaling. Ok, so I don't journal every night and I tend to only do it when I need to offload some mental clutter. I picked up my journal with the saying on the front that says:
"Life is Always Now"
As I held my pen in hand, I flipped to the front page. I'm not sure why. I guess I wanted to see some of the things I had already written this year. The first entry hit me hard. Probably because I'm still a little tough on myself.... but those last couple sentences made me realize that in the midst of what feels like defeat, there is still work to be done.... and that I am in control of what goes through my mind.
"JANUARY 2017
It's strange how you look back at the past year and all the things you learned... how they changed you, how you grew, how you see life and those around you.
2016 was a tough year. I had quite a few disappointments that weighed heavily on me.
It's tricky... because you're supposed to dream, believe, envision where you want to see yourself. All that mixed with a little bit of hope. And when you realize that you're not where you thought you'd be, it can be discouraging. I have moments when I question... is it worth it? Will I get there? Or am I just smashing a round peg into a square hole?
As frustrating as it can be, something in me tells me to keep going. To keep trying. To keep working.
And so I will. This year needs to be a more positive year for me... My responsibility to keep my mind in the right place."
I strongly believe we can have the life we want.
"The world you desire can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it's yours." - Ayn Rand
It may not be a fairytale. It may not be a direct path. It may happen in unexpected ways. It may mean that you end up at a different destination than originally thought.
Maybe you wanted to be the best powerlifter in your weight class. But injuries took you a different route. So you poured your heart into becoming athletic again.
Maybe you wanted to be a veterinarian. But the degrading health of your father kept you from completing vet school. So instead you started your own dog walking business.
Maybe you wanted to fly airplanes. But your new wife just gave birth to twins and the thought of being out of town so much doesn't sit well with you. So instead you find a job with an airline company that allows you to work a normal schedule, stay local, and help care for your new family.
I think the "end result" (if you can even say there is an end result.... much of life is about the process, not the final destination) is about your state of mind, not exact pieces or places. Flying planes may have, at that time, made you extremely happy, but it doesn't mean that you can't find an abundant life outside of that exact thing.
Continue to work toward whatever that thing is. It may take a few different turns, but finding peace and loving where you're at should be the ultimate goal.
Life is always now.