There's an old saying by a wise man from the early 800's that goes something like....
"If your training cycle goes really well, you'll probably have a bad meet. If you have a terrible training cycle, you'll have a good meet."
Ok, maybe that's only been floating around the powerlifting world for about 20 years, but it's probably been more true than not.
This training cycle went really well for me. I didn't have any major issues physically (injuries/pain), and I was starting to find my groove with squats and deadlifts. I was feeling strong and getting stronger! I was hitting good lifts, pushing accessories and grinding lifts out longer than I had in a long time.
Even though I knew that saying above was mostly true, I kept telling myself I was going to change the course of history and make a great training cycle turn into a great meet!
Weigh-ins were easy peasy. I had been under 132 for the past 6 months so I wasn't really concerned. Even had some coffee and eggs the morning of weigh-ins. Weighed in at 57.5 kilos (60k weight class).
SQUATS
Felt pretty good warming up. Weights felt light and things were moving smoothly.
Opened at 275 and it felt like garbage. I braced hard into my belt, hip and pelvis position felt great. However, as I started to descend, I felt no tension in my lower back. I couldn't feel my brace and my legs felt nothing either. I came up, muscled through it as I felt myself shift to my left a little and managed to get it.
Ok... not happy with it, but just gotta get tighter I guess. No doubt I can clean it up and nail my 2nd attempt.
2nd attempt was 297. Same thing happened again. As I started to go down, I could feel no tightness in my torso. It was like I wasn't getting any feedback from my body. I hit the hole and it was like my body went completely limp. I literally felt my lower back just lose everything.
Repeated that attempt for my 3rd. I tightened my belt up more, hoping to get a little more feedback from it. On the way down, I could still feel the same thing happening. I started to feel my low back collapse and I did exactly what you're not supposed to do, but I had to create tension somehow. I kicked my hips back and muscled my way through it. It was ugly, but I managed to salvage it for 3 white lights.
Honestly, pretty upset that I couldn't even manage a solid 300, but had to move on.
BENCH
At this point, the meet is moving pretty quickly. I started squats at 9 and it's now 11:15 and I'm benching. Again, warm-ups felt pretty good. My teammates were telling me hips were coming up just a tiny bit, so I knew on my first attempt I'd have to sacrifice just a little leg drive in order to make sure I hit my opener.
Opened with 170 which is something that I've done a thousand times. It moved slower than I would've liked, but at this point, I just needed to hit my 2nd, even if I had to grind it out.
Jumped to 181 and I again, felt nothing. I couldn't get tight. My lats, even though set, didn't feel engaged. There was NO WAY 180 should've crushed me the way it did.
Christian said, "Can you get your head together to try it again."
"Of course."
Had a much better bar path and tightness, but nothing.
1/3 on bench is the worst I've done in a long time, but still had to move on.
DEADLIFT
In a panic about not feeling tightness or feedback, I texted Dani LaMartina. She advised that some RPR might be helpful but to try actually doing some isolation exercises to feel things working. She said don't worry about fatigue, just looking for a pump.
So before warming up for deads, I grabbed a KB and did a bunch of sumo deads and some swings. Feeling better at this point and just hoping to finish the day off on a high note.
Warm-ups again felt great.
Opened with 314 which, as the rest of the day seemed to predict, moved slower than I would've liked. After watching a quick video, my hips were getting too far away from the bar. I needed to keep my hips in.
Christian told me to stop inching my feet in during my set up. Keep them out a little wider, which would in turn allow me to keep my hips in. Sure enough, second attempt at 330 was so much smoother. Slow and patient off the floor, but finished fast.
Christian wanted to jump something crazy, but I wanted to finish the day on a high note and pull more than what I pulled a year ago at this meet.
347 on my third was solid. Again slow and patient at the start and my position was super solid. Somehow managed a smile to end a crappy day on a good note.
I don't think I've gone 6 for 9 in many many many years. However, I think I've learned more about what I need in terms of getting ready for a meet. The training program itself is awesome. I feel healthy and strong. I think a shorter "prep/peak" is what I may try in the future.
TAKEAWAY
While the actual lifting part of this meet is something I'd rather soon forget, the weekend itself was awesome. We bumped into many other Chicagoland powerlifters from other gyms that we've gotten to know over the years and it's awesome to cheer them on and support other lifters.
We had amazing friends host us Saturday night to avoid driving an hour back and forth and for that we are so grateful. Amazing food, good stories and new friendships.
My biggest takeaway came after bench. I was frustrated after squats and even moreso after only getting my opener bench. Over the past few years, I've been pretty good about not letting missed lifts get to me. I've been through enough bad and good meets that I just try to move on with the day. But the fact that a 297 squat and 170 bench isn't even a fraction of what I'm capable of was really hitting a nerve.
I stepped off to the side and Christian came over to console me. I expressed all my frustrations about not being able to perform on meet day and not even getting my body to do what I want it to. Frustration over feeling good for the past 3 months and then struggling to hit numbers I should be doing in my sleep.
Why wasn't my body cooperating?
Why did I feel so strong and can't put it together?
Am I just not cut out for competing anymore?
I honestly had no desire to deadlift at this point, but I wasn't going to quit. I sat down with my teammates and gym family, letting myself calm down by eating PopTarts. I saw Christian chatting with a few people across the room. After about 5 minutes, he came over to me and said, "There's a lady over there that is super excited to meet you. You don't have to go now, but I did tell her I would round you up at some point to say hello."
I instantly started crying and I couldn't hold in my deepest thoughts at that point.
"See?" I told Christian. "There are people here who want to meet me and think I'm this great lifter and I can't even hit my most basic numbers! A guy and girl during squats wished me luck and the guy proceeded to tell me how excited his lifter was to be on the same platform as me! They are finding out that I'm really not all that great."
Christian leaned in and whispered...
"Dave Tate told me something years ago when I got brought onto the team. 'It's not about the numbers or things you're going to do. It's about the things you've done in the past that have gotten you here.' That's why you're a part of this team. These women look up to you for all that you've done for women in the sport. For all the things you've done for the past 20 years. That's why they look up to you, not for the numbers you might lift today."
I gathered myself up and said hello to this woman and she was the brightest ray of sunshine I could have at that exact moment. She told me how she listened to me on The Future is Female Powerlifting podcast and immediately said she wanted to get involved in the sport. She started following elitefts and reading all the information she could get her hands on.
THAT moment right there made an entire day worth it. To know that an interview I did impacted someone so much she wanted to get involved in the sport, search out information here on elitefts and find other women to connect with.
I'm far past where I was a decade ago in my lifting career. And every meet, good or bad, there are moments like this that put me back in my place and help me realize that the gift of strength I've been given is not my own doing. In fact, it's not even me being the strongest that is what's impacting. God has gifted me with opportunities to teach, educate and empower women to be strong, confident and find their worth through strength.
Dave, Traci and elitefts.... thank you for making these opportunities possible.
#LiveLearnPassOn
#IMpossible
@impossible.fit
@julia.ant_toe
