This topic could go many different directions, but I wanted to focus it on training and parenting.

Now, you may be thinking, "How in the world are those two things correlated?" Well, my friend, the cross-over is huge.

Parenting is a lot of work. It's a careful balance of discipline, love, being firm, caring, patient and supportive. We set boundaries to protect our children, but also give room for them to learn and experience on their own.

In 2015, I got divorced.  The last thing I wanted to do was to see my kids struggle through that transition.  They are very resilient children and we talked a lot about what our lives would look like.

Over the next 3 years, I navigated the waters of doing this solo.  I didn't realize that in my haste of time management, ease and simplicity, I was forgetting some important pieces of parenting.

I didn't notice those things until Christian moved here from Memphis and began spending time with us every day. And now that we are married and living together, he has seen even more of it.

His outside view of some of my interactions with the kids provided some insight to things that I never really noticed before.  In my single mom hurry of getting the kids out the door on time, I found myself just doing things for them... picking up breakfast plates, packing back packs, etc.... all things that they are fully capable of doing on their own.

In my frustration to get homework done without tears or complaints or on time because we had things to do, I was over-helping instead of guiding.  Those are more things didn't become apparent until Christian pointed them out. A few conversations helped me to realize that I needed to allow them more mistakes, or let them forget school stuff after reminding them 15 times, or that they will be late to practice because they didn't finish their work.

Anto family julia

I'll admit, this was very difficult for me at first.  Not because I wanted to coddle my kids, but because it was challenging.  It was different. it was something that not only they had to get used to, but I did.  I had to be a little more patient with the process.

An outside point of view helped me to see things differently.  Sometimes training is the same way.  As Dave Tate has said many times, no one knows YOU like you do.  Especially as a lifter who has been training for some time, you should have an idea of what has worked and what hasn't. But a training partner or mentor's views can always bring a different light.

Those opinions aren't meant for you to throw the baby out with the bath water.  They are meant for you to take a step back and look at the bigger picture, to see things through a different lens. They might give you a view you'd never really noticed before.

Just like my parenting, I needed to see a different point of view.  Christian's point in bringing those things to my attention wasn't to say that I was doing anything wrong, or that I had parented incorrectly for the last couple years.  In fact, no one knows my kids better than I do... I know their quirks and personalities.  I know what makes them tick and what shuts them down.  But his observations let me see things from a side that I hadn't noticed before.

It has been some work on my end. I've had to let them struggle through homework a little more.  I've had to let them learn the consequences of disobeying a little more harshly. And in the end, it's been good for everyone. And we are still working on it.

Be open to hearing from people you trust, people who have your best interests at heart, people who care about your success.  Never will you have it all figured out. And if you think you do, well, you're in for a world of awakening.

In the Anto household, we have kids doing dishes without being asked... I'll take it.