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I have the blahs. I guess it’s the quarantine blahs. There is no real reason for me to have the blahs. There is plenty of food in the house, plenty of toilet paper, my dog loves me every day, my bills are paid, and I have weights with which to train. I do not have a home gym—no bench, no squat rack. I do floor presses from two pickle buckets. I can deadlift, and I use a combination of weights and bands for my legs. I have two sets of elitefts bands, and they have proved to be invaluable.

Many thanks to the elitefts columnists for their innovative ideas on how to exercise at home and the many uses of bands. I find new ideas every day. So much so, that I am beating my ass trying many of them. I guess the reason for the blahs is the lack of social interaction. I have everything I need to survive. But we are a sociable species. For many, it is the workplace, or religious gatherings, or family and friend gatherings. But for me, and I think maybe for you, it is the gym. I miss my clients and the camaraderie of the gym regulars with whom I train. Truth be told, I need their help. I have become accustomed to hand-offs on the bench press, and I will not squat heavy without spotters. I also need help getting into my bench shirt and squat suit. I both miss and need my gym buddies.


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Without going into all that I do, I will tell you some of what I do. The bar I have at home is a BUFFALO BAR™. It is not only curved but also longer than a regular bar. On my speed bench day (floor press), I do three sets of three reps at four different hand placements, i.e., very close, moderately close, regular bench position, and very wide. I often do as many as five sets at the regular bench position. I also do a great deal of back work. The equipment I have is conducive to back exercises, wide-grip deadlifts, deadlifts, bent-over rows, and pulls from many angles with bands. My squat may suffer. I hope to have a much stronger back.

Now, what are we going to do? I usually have a plan for anything important that I do. The plan doesn’t always work and often have to improvise or use a back- up plan. Nevertheless, I have a plan. What is this country’s plan? I don’t think there is one. Some of the states have a plan and many have started to open their economy. The issue seems to me, not whether to open the economy, but how to open the economy. It seems to me, we have to be smart, and we are; we just need to use those smarts in how we open. I may be naïve, but it is hard for me to understand how a disease that is ravaging the country has become a political issue. At the time of this writing, there are over 1.5 million confirmed cases in the country and about 90,000 deaths. I am certain the virus doesn’t give a shit about your political preferences. I am in the category of people that they say can be most affected by the virus, over 65 with a pre-existing condition (COPD). If you think it is OK for my demographic to be sacrificed to the virus, please pick someone in your family over 65, parent, grandparent, aunt, or uncle who can be sacrificed. If not, then shut the fuck up. I fact, I will bake you a batch of shutthefuckupcakes.

Q: Are we getting ready for lecture from the little old man?

A: Not really, but maybe a history lesson.

I was alive when Pearl Harbor was attacked and the U.S. entered into World War II. There was an enemy we could see and who was killing us and our allies. The country pulled together and did without what had heretofore been thought of as necessities. We did so willingly and everyone pitched in for the good of the country and the war effort. An epidemic that I do remember was polio in the late 1940s. I recall as a kid of eight or nine that we couldn’t go swimming, go to the movies, or go out of our yard to play with friends. These were all big deals at our age, but you do what you have to do.


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My point in all of these ramblings is we must do what is necessary to defeat the virus and get the country’s economy cooking again. We are four percent of the world’s population and have 30 percent of the virus. I am not in favor of closing the country, but I am in favor of opening it in a smart way that does not increase our risk. I am not a small business owner, so I shall not opine about opening small businesses. When I practiced law, I was a one-man firm with three or four employees and four kids to feed and educate. I don’t know how I could have survived for many months. Again, we do what we have to do.

So here’s the deal. I don’t care how we do it; we have to defeat this virus and be smart in doing so. We cannot allow a second wave like the Spanish Flu of 1919 to kick our ass. My demographic has only so much time to compete. We need to get on with it and back on the platform as soon as it is safe to do so. Be smart and stay safe.

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