Shannon and I had a date night. Great opening line right?

We also owed supper to Paul Oneid who handled Shannon at her last meet. And, it was Paul's birthday. Lots of birds stoned at once.

We went for sushi with Paul, Pam, Jay Nera and a few other people. Two of the others were a young couple, Mike and Jen, expecting their first child.

They asked if we had any advice for them. Anyone that knows me, knows that I always want to give advice on stuff. I'm just waiting for someone to ask me 🙂

Here are some of the items I advised:

  • Write things down. Raising a kid goes by so fast you forget a lot of things that you wished you remembered. Like first hair cut, first words. Facebook is annoying most of the time, but it is handy for taking pictures and keeping these types of moments. Some parents freak out if they have pictures of their kids on Facebook. Those people are weridos.
  • Laugh at yourself. Being a first time parent is terrifying. But, eventually you realize most of the things you worried about didn't matter at all. Here is a hypothetical example (it totally happened to me a few times); If you put a diaper on incorrectly and your kid pisses everywhere, don't get mad that there is a mess or that you are covered in piss. Laugh. There will be a constant state of mess for a few years and you will get shit on you at some point.   After a few years go by, you will laugh about these times and tell everyone about the time little Timmy pissed in your face, all while smiling. You are going to laugh later at these moments. So why not laugh now?
  • Get away as much as a possible. I don't mean to the Bahamas or a cruise through Europe. Although, those things would be nice. I mean go out as much as you can WITHOUT your kid. Shannon and I are lucky and both sets of grandparents are pretty close and want their beautiful grandson as much as possible. If you are not as lucky as us, find someone you trust to babysit and get out of the house together at least once a month. Once a week is great, but for most it's not feasible. Even if it's an hour walk to get a coffee and talk about things not baby-centric. Always keep these times positive. Talk about things you want or things you want to do and plan things. Smile. Smile a lot. It helps.
  • Love your kid.  This one might sound like a given, but it's not. Especially in that first year if your kid is not a good sleeper. You will be sleep deprived, sex deprived and probably hungry (that last one might just be me). NO matter how much you want to punt your kid out the window. Don't. Really. Never punt a child. Instead. Pause. Say out loud "I love you kid". Hug them, not to tight, and trust things will get better. Not easier. Better.