Having reflected on my meet I've recognized things that I need to work on to reach my goal and have decided that I'm going to have another go at it. I do desire to quit competing but with my long term goal of squatting 1,000 remaining, I can't quit just yet.
The main reason I was unsuccessful at the meet was because I wasn't mentally prepared for the extra challenges that arose. When I struggled to unrack the weight unsuccessfully it broke my focus and concentration and things unwraveled from there. I think part of the reason I lost my focus was that the outside factors involved with competing versus training. I completely understand that's one of the reasons competing is more challenging than training and I even knew that beforehand but failed to prepare for it. When I train it's my world. I control all the variables and while that seems great for that training session it is awful when in a situation where you need to perform but can't control the variables. I was so accustomed to using the same monolift, same barbell, the same everything that when those factors changed I struggled physically which in turn derailed my entire thought process, focus, confidence and ultimately my day.
Next time- I'm not sure when I'll get back on the platform but during the preparation for that day I'll insert variables so I'm better prepared to adapt to variables on meet days. I'll be squatting from different monolifts, using different barbells and taking varied rest periods between sets/attempts. I'll also be focusing more on my bench than I did last training cycle too.
One more trip for me, hopefully, this one will take me to my final remaining goal.