Oh boy did I like Ring Dings. I often forget a lot of you don't remember my fluffy days. You only know the leaner and meaner (yeah, you get mean when you don't get to eat what you want when you want) dieting machine I am now. Seriously though, I did regularly stock my gym bag with Ring Dings for pre and post workout, take that Monster!
Considering I am down and out for a bit as far as lifting is concerned, I need something to write about. Luckily Dave Tate recently sent me the image above and it immediately reminded me of the good ole' days and the story that inspired it.
Back in the day, I was a top-ranked bencher. That used to be a big deal. Seriously, there were big-time bench only meets. I blame the downfall on Crossfit where they really don't bench. Maybe I can also blame it on geared powerlifting where competitors actually struggled to get the weight to touch. It looked totally ridiculous so I get it.
Anyway, I was competing in the inaugural Bench America contest. This was an awesome meet that brought the best bench pressers from around the country to compete in an arena in Chicago. We were treated like royalty. It was televised on Fox Sports, they had official programs featuring the athletes, and even had rings for the winners. That's pretty dope if you ask me.
As you can see from the picture, conditioning and cardio were not my strong points back then. I was really good at laying down and pressing things up. Other than that, pretty useless.
This was my first trip to Chicago and I was really excited until... Holy hell! O'hare Airport is gargantuan. Now I always dress appropriately for the airport and was wearing shorts, a tee shirt, and flip-flops. This was pretty much my standard outfit all year long considering I couldn't tie my shoes and I was always sweating regardless of the temperature.
First, I barely made it to baggage claim. I was so out of breath and had an unGodly low back pump, that happens a lot when you are fat and walk more than ten yards. It was brutal.
Luckily Jessica was there to enable, I mean, help me. She loaded herself up with both our carry on bags, both our travel bags, and my gym bag filled with gear which even had boards for board presses in it. For those of you who don't know what board presses are, they are a bunch of heavy a$$ 2" by 6" boards screwed together used at the time to help me warm up in my bench shirt.
With Jessica loaded up like a pack mule, we were headed for ground transportation. Yep, I quickly remembered how stupidly big O'Hare was. I think my back locked up after a good fifty feet or so, no joke. I ended up leaning against the closest heavy object that could hold me.
Luckily an airport employee in one of those electric carts took pity on us. The ironic part was, he wasn't there to help the woman carrying upwards of 150 lbs worth of bags. He was more worried about the fat guy who was sweating profusely and grimacing in pain. Ah, bless that wonderful man who gave us a ride. I think I tipped him a Snickers bar or two from my fanny pack. And yes, I did say fanny pack.
The ordeal was well worth it. I ended up winning my weight class and was even interviewed for TV (videos below).
MY BENCH PRESS IS AT 9:02
MY INTERVIEW IS AT 1:20