Here I go posting as the Sarcastic Instagram Dickhead (SID) again. It’s been a minute... again.
Update on the now Fat SID Dad Functional Conjugate Training Program.
When you have no meet in sight, EVER, all #real training is for The Gram #gramstrong, or should I write #gramsstrong? for those more #dedicated to their #instacraft. Many weeks ago, I was running a band cycle and wondered if I’d be able to handle five bands per side. The phase went great, and 4 per side went really well - wait... #strongAF #likeAbeast #latixPower. It was like 3500lbs. at the top! The #gaintrain was rolling hard because, after one down week, I went #allin #saVAGe and squatted a #chopperhigh cheater band record. Oh... #PRs #allday #everyway #everyway #PRbaby #prcrew #prfam
I decided why not just start where I left off (weeks ago)? You know, live in the #moment type shit #seizetheday #NOW. Training is overrated anyhow! I loaded 5 bands/side on the SS Yoke #bastard and let the #sickness begin. Sets went #ok for the first bunch, and then I started adding weight #smokeshow #lightweightbaby! First jump, added a dime, and while you wouldn’t think so, it went from real fast to smash my dick #work. I added another dime to make it easier. #thatBMeatheadlogic. Well, that didn’t work, as you can see. I almost blew my balls off again. Reminder last time? Yeah, I found them #oldwrinkleddusted under the belt squat machine.
Lessons:
One of the many reasons to do max effort work is seen here. It not only teaches you to strain, but to be able to strain and “think.” When that shit stopped, I got zapped back into reality and had to process what the fuck went wrong and how to recover. I knew I got a bit forward because of the tension on my feet and upper back and I know my hamstrings are big weakness right now. I forced my heels back into the ground (like a leg curl) while driving my neck into the bar. This got the bar moving again, as it drives hips forward and head back. Had I not spent years training for chaos I would have just pushed and failed. All this is NOT optimal, but in training and competing, you will sometimes find yourself in non-optimal states.
Because my weak point was overstressed, it meant that stress got transferred. Thus, my quad tendons are trashed so I’m doing tons of TKEs, backward treadmill walks, and seated calf raises to get back on track. Oh, rolling the quads with the dumb foam thing feels #great-not! #duespaid #doingmytime
Jumping a dime didn’t work. I should have jumped a plate and not been a #scared piece of shit #meatheadlogiccanwork