As many of you know, my son got into Bishops College Prep School in Sherbrook Canada. Without being "THAT Dad", he is an A++ student and is pretty darn good at hockey as well. It made sense for him to pursue academics and athletics in the Big Wide Open Ocean of education instead of being in the small bubble that he has always known here in California.
To say the transition was easy would be a HUGE lie. The house is empty, the trips to and from the ice rink are gone and just our normal cajoling is now tapped out in letters on a keyboard.
For HIM, the first two weeks were awful. He was ready to head home after the first night.
But I knew as soon as he took to the ice with his new team and got to know some of the kids, things would start to look up for him.
During one of his "negative episodes", he told me that he was doubtful if he would make the travelling squad. The kids were "so much better" than he's ever played and that he didn't feel "worthy".
He proceeded to further explain that he's the youngest (again) on his team, that he feels isolated, and to top it off...The academics were stuff that he already has done. (my kid is weird. He took (for fun) a college math course at BYU and nailed it!
Regardless, he has the Selkow name and that is synonymous with "Never Quit".
No matter how well or poorly he has played a game (of any sport), and even if he got an A instead of an A+ I never focused on the outcome as much as I did the effort he put forth.
Yesterday, a gal came into my gym to participate in the Crossfit section. I'm there an hour earlier than the class so when this young lady (or anyone for that matter) walks into my gym, I make it a habit to greet them. To let them know that I'm here and will get you started or at least settle you in. This gal was definitely a stranger to the gym atmosphere and I couldn't get to her as I was extremely busy. I then watched her go through the class and when she was totally out of her element I realized she needed a "Harry Pep Talk".
She was red in the face and sweating profusely, panting like a talk in 100-degree weather and I strode upon her with my 1000 yard stare and asked her if her feet hurt? She looked at me breathlessly and asked "why"? To which I responded, "I wonder why your feet hurt because of how much ass she was kicking". She began to cry. I realized that this was an emotional moment for her. So I continued..."In my program, the people tell others that their success is just showing up. My response is always...'Never Quit'. For YOU young lady the toughest step you took was to get your ass in here today and put it on the line. The journey of a million miles begins with one step. I am sorry I didn't get to you early, but I wanted to tell you how proud I am of your intestinal fortitude...also known as GUTS". She cried harder!
Back to my son...
I realize that I don't really care if you ever make the NHL, NFL, MLB, play in the Olympics, have a 2500 pound total, win a bodybuilding contest. What I care about is the effort you put in day in and day out and that you look for small improvements.
My son not only made the travel team, he also is the center for the third line out of four that go.
My son not only performed well for the youngest guy on the team, but he also led all categories except the sit up which he took second place and against much bigger and older players. He squatted a PR of 315 at a body weight of 107 I don't really care about ANY of that, as long as he added..."Dad, I gave it my all!"
I commended him on it! That's why one of my personal favorite shirts we have at EliteFTS is the "Driven" one. My boy wears it and I am proud of him for it!
You work day to day on giving it your ALL and the rewards will take care of themselves.
Now it's really up to you to figure out what "ALL" means on any given day at any given moment.
I think we are at about 20% leaving 80% when most of us think we only have that 20% to give.
Here's my favorite coaching cue..."Bullshit! Try fucking harder"
It’s been a little bit since I have been lucky enough to do a SELKOW 1000 rep arm day or explosive deadlifts but I still check in and read your Coaching Logs everyday. I couldn’t agree more about the effort. Your words still echo on my mind that you may not be the biggest or the strongest but you can control your effort. I took the mentality as the new football kid out here in Florida and it has paid off! I am currently playing outside linebacker and love every second of it. Serious program out here going against some really good schools. Anyways, I don’t want to take up to much of your time, I just wanted to let you know that even out here in Florida you motivate me everyday to become better. Thank you for that!
Sincerely,
Cole Tuthill
Thank you Sir Its a privilege to be “One of your boys”. I won’t stop grinding and I’ll keep in touch.
Sincerely,
Cole Tuthill