Some days just aren’t your day. Shit happens – maybe you screwed up a job assignment, missed reps in the gym, or got into a squabble with your girlfriend. When it’s just one day, it’s easy to write that off, but when off days turn into off weeks or off months, it gets hard to give your all to anything, and it’s easy to start feeling sorry for yourself.
I did that earlier this spring, after my dissertation defense went awry. It took a lot of help from my support system to pull my head out of my ass – and honestly, it came down to Ed Koo telling me straight up that that’s what I needed to do. Look, he said: you’ve got it really damned good. You’re not dying, you don’t have cancer. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
That really clicked for me, and, on top of my awesome experience (and admittedly mediocre performance) at the US Open, I got back on track fast. But if you’re not quite there yet, I want to help you get there now. There’s really only three steps.
Find Your Motivation
Now, when it comes to motivation, I’m a big fan of meditation. But honestly, it was losing the US Open that reminded me why I do this shit: I really fucking love to lift.
After Ross pulled for the 600 Wilks at that meet, it really took the wind out of my sails. I felt like I had been punched in the gut because we knew going in that I was capable of a 600 Wilks (that's why I cut to 193 – so we'd only need to chip 2039 to hit it), but it was out of the question by the time deads came around, and there was no way I was gonna win.
At that point I didn't know how I was going to have the mental strength to finish strong, so I called my friend, training partner, and fellow coach Dominic Morais to ask for advice, and he basically told me "Look, you were never in this for the money in the first place. Why don't you just do it for you?" Obviously I'd heard that before, but for some reason, at that moment, it really clicked, and I've felt dramatically different since.
If you’re struggling to remember why you’re lifting, try instead thinking about what’s really important in your life. For me, it’s not lifting, as much as I love it. My friends and family (including my new family, Staci) are what really matter, and remembering that makes it much easier to remember how fun it is to smash fucking weight.
A Bonus: My New Powerbuilding Program
Hey, sometimes you need to change things up if you want to step the fuck up and get motivated. If you’re looking for a new program, click through to the YouTube video and check it out.
Think Strong, Train Hard – In That Order
Look, just being motivated isn’t enough. You have to use that motivation in the right way if you want to be successful! I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of guys who go all gung-ho beastmode warrior style on Instagram – and they’re usually the same guys who overreach, miss reps, and underperform at meets. Don’t be that guy. Start with the motivation, then make a plan, and then you will have the confidence necessary to carry out that plan. Your end results will be hugely improved for having done so.
Chill the Fuck Out
At the end of the day, getting excited comes down to not taking life so seriously. The more you can relax and let go, the happier you’ll be – and that’s why I suggested above trying to focus on what’s really important in your life. It makes everything else feel a lot lighter and it takes all the pressure off. If you’re still struggling, remember: the storylines running through your head aren’t real. Focus on real life, genuine experiences, and what makes you the happiest, and I guarantee you’ll be the strongest you’ve ever been and ever will be. I truly believe that, and I hope you do too.