It started out as a joke this morning when I opened up the gym to a few sleepy headed people. Mind you, I get up at 3:00 AM to ride a stationary bike, then eat breakfast, cycle into work so I have been up for a while on purpose so I can give everyone else a hard time.
I digress, but the conversation turned to getting up in the night to go to the bathroom. As I get older the frequency of such trips has increased over the years. I was explaining how I refuse to squat when I pee, and I do it by active sonar. God forbid you don't hear the water on water splash sound...means it's on the floor or the wall. I mused as far as to explain the benefits of putting a urinal into the master bath....urinal cake and all.
The laughter increased as I held the attention of both the fellas and gals in the group. The question came up, "why don't you just turn around and sit down?" My reply was typical of all my replies..."WHAT? I'm a man. Men need to do man things and women need to do lady things. Squatting down to pee is a lady thing. MEN stand up!!!" I then remember the millennial that called me mysogenist. I didn't know what that even meant, so I had to look it up.
Contrary to the definition I do not hate women! As a matter of fact, women are my favorite sex. However, I am not that flexible with my beliefs nor my thoughts, quite simply I adhere to the saying, "Women are not like men and Men shouldn't be like women".
When I hear my own demure and sensitive bride say, "People are weak" I have to put my stamp of approval to it.
We "Try" things. That's bullshit! You either do it or you don't do it. I have many examples of how you can't "try" to snatch a dime out of my hand. You either grab it, or I keep it!
You look at a loaded bar. It has more weight than you have ever done. You either muster up the guts to go for it, or you puss out and pass "until next time".
Fuck that! I can remember unracking a shit ton of weight on the squat. My entire body was shaking under the pressure like a person about to have a seizure. I settled the weight and KNEW I was either gonna get it or get smashed in a glorious heap of flesh and torn muscle. What did I do? I started to sit my hips back and squat the weight. I did get smashed, but I had spotters. So WHAT? I also fortified my manhood.
Sometimes you don't need a plan as much as you do need BALLS.
Seriously, the term "I'm offended" is too easily repeated. If you are so weak that mere words put you out of sort, then you probably deserve whatever has been said.
What "HARD" thing have you recently accomplished?
What is something that made your heart rate accelerate?
What is the last thing that you just said, "FUCK IT" and went for it?
If you can't site something right of way, you better start "Cowboying UP".
Stand up when you pee
Zip your pants in the front and not the side
and stop being such a pussy!
Today's training:
AirDyne: 25 minutes
Bike Commute: 27 mins.
OHP: 5x10
BB Curl: 4x10
DB LR: 4x12
DB Hammer Curl: 4x8
Rear Delt Raise: 4x15
Spider Curls: 4x8
Shrugs: 4x10
Chin ups (assisted) 200 reps
Bike Commute: 25 minutes