This has been a break out year for The Girl. Though years training and watching us compete, she is now coming into her own and finding her athletic niche. In addition to her time training in the gym with us, this past spring she started throwing shot and discus. She quickly learned that she is pretty good at them, enjoys doing it and has found her competitive spirit.
This summer she has decided to step up her game a bit and compete in USA Track & Field (USATF) meets, start learning HOW to throw and is working with a weightlifting coach as well. She has hopes of also competing in a USA Weightlifting meet this fall, however a decision for that will be made as the meet draws near.
At this stage of the game, it is obvious that her strength is carrying her to success and she reports wanting to transition from good to great. This transition is proving to consume an extensive amount of time and commitment that in some ways I believe is too much for an 11 year old. However, as long as she wants to ride this ride, we will be there supporting her and mitigating the compromises and sacrifices. If tomorrow she wants off this ride, that is a decision she has full control over.
Last weekend was the USATF Association meet to qualify for regionals. While The Girl is pretty good at shot, discus seems to be even better. For her age group, nationally she is within the top 2-3% for both. That is an amazing spot to be since this is her first year, has TONS of room for improvement with her technique and is on the bottom end of her age division. She is driven to win and it is my job to make sure that she understands how to be a good competitor. Learning how to be a good competitor requires instruction, no different than the time she spends lifting and throwing.
Rewind to last weekend…..
Shot was done and she took second on that event. It was hard on her but continues to be an outstanding reminder that she needs to learn and stay committed. Discus is where she truly shines. She took her second throw on discus and someone complimented her on a great throw. To which The Girl responded, “Ugh. I am not warmed up. I throw much further.”
At the end of the day, I sat down to talk with her. She was upset she didn’t throw better for shot, she took second place, AKA losing, and that she didn’t hit a PR for discus. I asked her that if she was so competitive that in her mind all she wanted to do was crush her competition , tear them in two, win with authority and scream, “What now???” She laughed and asked how I knew. Oh, I know. It goes through my mind at every competition and then I beat myself up that I could have done better. Those feelings are normal, it is called being competitive. That is the fire that will stay with her through training and the off season to WANT to continue to get better.
However, we needed to have a serious conversation about her response when someone congratulated her for a good throw. It is natural to be frustrated, it is natural to want to always do your best BUT…when someone recognizes an accomplishment or shares positive feedback with you, stop the excuses and ALWAYS say thank you. It’s that simple, “Thank you.”
It is disrespectful to the person who took the time to recognize something you did AND it is disrespectful to your fellow competitors. There were girls in an older division she out threw and maybe they hit a PR, maybe they were on the fence for even coming to compete, maybe they feel like you did about their own throws, or maybe now they have an impression that once you made that comment, you inadvertently put down their own accomplishments. There is a time to be competitive, there is also a time to be a gracious competitor. You can win all the competitions you want to, but if in the process you are not gracious and kind to your fellow competitors, it just makes you a jerk who wins.
The girl qualified for regionals, which is this weekend. Deciding to take the trip to regionals is purposeful and part of the process. Her goal this weekend is to qualify for nationals. More to come!
The First Installment: