Allow me to introduce myself.   For those who aren’t familiar with me, my name is Skip and I am an asshole.  Well, at least this is what I hear on a regular basis in emails from people that don’t agree with my brash, out-spoken opinions.  Personally, I think I’m a great guy.  My friends say I am quite fun to be around and my wife, well, it depends on the day.  If you were married for twenty years you would know that one day you’re a saint and the next, well, an asshole.  Gay guys love me, though.  Must be my metro side so I do have that to fall back on, I guess.  It's good to have options.


I have been in this sport for almost thirty years so I have nurtured a perspective of the sport of bodybuilding that some see as jaded and a bit arrogant.  I fancy myself quite humble, actually, but in a sport where twenty-year olds consider themselves experts, I can see how I get that label and from whom I get it.  My peers and well-respected people in the sport don’t see it the same way.  In fact, they usually are cheering me on when I destroy the would-be-could-be experts because most are busy and don’t have the time to focus on responding to this sort of thing.  Plus, most are above the immaturity and consider themselves to be professional.  Let’s be clear here:  I do not.  I am the king of immaturity and if you get into an internet, name-calling, put-down argument with me, you will lose.  I make my living on the internet and have for about twelve years starting on the bodybuilding boards.  I have dealt with the scum of the earth and learned from the best.  My skill set is that of Master Status.  Basically, there is me and then there is everyone else.  Ok, maybe I am a LITTLE arrogant.


My writing is based primarily on the things and people in this sport that drive me bat-shit crazy.  My Rants sometimes piss people off because at some point in the near future I am going to go off about something that you do and you are going to take it personally and instead of laughing at yourself you are going to get pissed at me.  That’s ok, though, because I am good for it and these days society struggles with accountability, anyway, so blaming someone else is sooo much easier.  So, here I am, blame me.  Blame me for all of the stupid shit you do that I call you on.  And then be sure and email me telling me how fat and ugly my wife is and how you are actually the father of two of my four children and that I should put a piece of your anatomy in my mouth and …. You get the picture.  Yes, these are emails that I get.


Photo courtesy of Isaac Hinds/Liftstudios.com
I can get away with calling everyone out for perpetuating the stereotype of the meathead bodybuilder because it was ME, for years, who did most of the stupid shit that I rant about.  So, if you feel that I am picking on others to make myself feel better, that isn’t it, at all.  I am actually trying to help others to not do and act certain ways so that down the road they will reflect back on and feel stupid for how they carried themselves, how they acted and how they were perceived by other people.  And if you say it doesn’t matter, I don’t want to hear from you when I say something that pisses you off.  Trust me, in the insecure sport of bodybuilding, oh, it matters.


The sport of bodybuilding has a lot of great people in it and I have met a lot of them over the last thirty years.  At the same time, the sport breeds some of the most narcissistic and self-centered people on this planet, as well.  Focusing on the positive doesn’t happen in the media for a reason – no one cares and it isn’t entertaining.  Same goes for my Just Sayin’ Rants.  If I wrote about the good in the sport no one would read a word of what I type.  Why?  Because that is boring and you and I both know that picking on people who act stupid is far more fun.  I mean, can you believe I get paid for this?  I get to make fun of people in the sport and get attention and get PAID for it?  Life is good.


You might not like what I say but you can count on it being the truth.  You may not agree with me but I am right (always).  Ultimately, you will want to keep coming back and reading my column because I will irritate the shit out of you with my opinions.  I am also witty, good looking and great in bed.  None of those traits matter much for my column but if you had your own column you would probably try to work in some lies about yourself, as well.  If everyone listened to me and took my advice the sport wouldn’t have such a terrible stereotype and people outside of the sport would not think we are all egotistical idiots that can’t discuss anything outside of what we squatted that day or post pictures on Facebook about what we ate last weekend for our cheat meal.


Come along for the ride and I hope you enjoy my column.  If you don’t like it then I will look forward to the entertainment of your hate email.  Either way, I win.  Just Sayin’.


 


Skip