Psychobabble Bullsh*t...

(or what goes on in my mind)

When I'm going through difficult times, I often spend a lot of time listening to music. Especially music with lyrics I relate to, or which accurately expresses the state of my current emotions.

I took lyrics from a handful of songs by one of my favorite artists (I'm certain many of you can figure out who) I've been listening to a lot lately and pulled bits and pieces from many of them and altered the wording where I needed to and put it together into a sort of a poem that reflects the inner angst I have been dealing with for the last month or so.

Before reading this, just know that while these words reflect my feelings it doesn't mean that I'm acting on any of it. This is just a form of expression and coping mechanism for me. I thought I'd share this simply because I thought many of you would find it interesting, or could possibly relate.

And for those of you that may be concerned about me, don't be. I'm fine and like any form of adversity. I'll be stronger for having gone through it.

The innocent I want to kill
What you won't do I will
I bash myself to sleep
What I sow I cannot reap
I scar myself you see
I wish I wasn't me
I hate therefore I am
Goddamn your righteous hand
I hate the hater, I'd rape the raper
I am the animal who will not be himself
I am the ism, my hate's a prism
Let's just kill everyone and let your god sort them out
Oh no, it is everything they said it was
Oh no, I am all the things they said I was
Don't pick the scabs or you will never heal
The world shudders as the worm gets its wings
The boy that you loved is the monster you fear
I was born into this
Everything turns to shit
Scar, can you feel my power?
Shoot here and the world gets smaller
Scar, can you feel my power?
One shot and the world gets smaller
Without the threat of death
There's no reason to live at all
I say it is and then it's true,
There is a dream inside a dream,
I'm wide awake the more I sleep