No training today. Instead, I had to take the day off to pick up my daughter Carmen at college. I had to move her from the house she's currently living in to another one where she will be living next semester and then bring her home for a while. I had to drive two and a half hours out to Amish country, take a couple truckloads of her stuff out of her second floor apartment, and drive it a half mile down the road to her third floor apartment.

The trip started with me having to eat on the road because I wanted to get an early jump on traffic. McDonald’s was a bad choice. I had to stop at the very first rest stop I came to because I needed to take a dump. I thought it would give me energy because my dog always seems really energized after he craps in the yard. He comes into the house and runs around like a maniac. But it didn’t really work for me quite like that.

Of course, being in a small Pennsylvania town, both of my daughter’s apartments are complete pieces of shit. The first place was riddled with beer cans, trash, and vodka bottles and was just generally filthy. The new place she moved into was one of those busted up, 150-year-old houses where, for some reason, the further up you go, the narrower the staircase gets. So carrying stuff up to the third floor was a total pain in the ass. Not fitting through the doorways and staircases coupled with the fact that I’ve been training to look huge and yummy but really haven’t done any cardio rendered me just about useless after about three trips up and down those steps. My quads were burning, and I felt like I was going to throw up. Jesus! How did I become so fucking useless?

I became even more useless on the way home because I couldn’t stay awake to save my life—or my daughter’s! The only thing that separated us from a sure death was the fact that she was too afraid to sleep and kept screaming out in terror like a little drama queen.

After a few hours of being on the road, my hamstring and hip started to cramp up, forcing us to stop again so that I could stretch out a little. This trip was taking forever. God, I’m really pathetic!

Carmen decided that we needed some coffee to stave off vehicular death, so we stopped again for a Starbucks coffee with an extra shot of espresso. That really did the trick, and I was once again back in the zone raising da roof. However, as soon as I was finished drinking my coffee, it somehow instantly wore off and I was tired once again. Wow, I'm a fucking slug. I’m supposed to drive all the way to Ohio this Thursday for the LTT6. If I don’t show up, you'll all know what happened to me. Please send out a search party for me between Philly and Columbus.


If you live in or are ever visiting the Glenolden, PA area look Steve up at his Iron Sport Gym