Writer Matt Potak checks in with Team Swole Patrol.

“Who is the Swole Patrol? No one really knows. It’s been whispered in dark places that they are unicorns or wizards.” - Zach Nicolay

MP: It’s been a while since we have heard from the Swole Sisters, so I will proceed with caution on this one. Rumors have indicated that they are training for a cage match against the Williams sisters.
So you’ve heard the rumors? Just to clarify, the hormone treatment is almost complete to make the Swole Sisters into REAL men, so once it is we are gonna give them a taste of Thunder and Lightning!
The prevailing thought is that when New York finally sanctions Mixed Martial Arts, Dana White will then lobby for the first-ever tag team fight. And when they do, guess who’s gonna be ready to break some necks and cash some checks?

MP: Guys it's a pleasure to interview you on EliteFTS. What have you been up to lately?
SP: We have been extremely busy with the online and on site development of the business. Ultimately when you run two businesses at the same time, like we are doing here, it can become very time consuming. On one side, we have to do everything we can to make sure Elite S/C (or what everyone has come to know as the “MAN Cave”) is running as smoothly as possible and that our members are making their proper progressions. On the other side, we need to make sure that our online followers are sufficiently updated.
So to answer your question, after about a month now, the gym is up and running. The only thing we are waiting for now is the sandpit. Once that is in place, we are gonna be 100 percent on-cue with what our vision of the perfect strength and conditioning facility should be.
As for the online side of things, we are always preaching the good word of SWOLE and making a big push to brand our training method that we have developed over the years (called the Elite Method for the Meat Headed). As of right now, the biggest things we are doing for that is promoting our first training seminar from August 5th-7th, launching the membership site www.TeamSwolePatrol.com in late July or early August, and then actually developing the Elite Method for the Meat Headed manual for all the SWOLEdiers out there who want to become the American Ass Kicking Machines that we produce here at the MAN Cave!

MP: For those who don’t know, please tell us about yourselves and what team Swole Patrol represents?
SP: Well, I started out like most strength coaches of today did. I had all the desire and motivation to compete and dominate in team sports, just not enough of the raw talent and/or quality coaching to get me to the next level in my given sport (baseball). I had the typical high school coach that absolutely sucked at programming our strength and conditioning. His mindset was one that in order to make faster more explosive athletes, agility ladders and mile run intervals should be run until you puked or saw the face of Jesus. You can imagine the frustration all of us had when our athletic careers were ruined by this avalanche of stupidity. After going to the University of Florida, meeting and training with strength coach and Strongman competitor Matt Delancey, and realizing strength should be the foundation of every power athlete's program, I made it my goal to enlighten anybody and everybody about this so that they would not make the same mistakes I did. So after graduating from UF, I took an internship spot in Tampa working with USF’s Strength and Conditioning Department, while also working as a personal trainer at Lifestyle Family Fitness. As miserable as I was at both, I’m now grateful for the experience because of the focus they gave me on who I am, and what I needed to do.
Because of how embarrassingly week and puny I feel that the average man has become given the nature of these corporate gyms, and my inability to conform to different college strength coaches methods, I decided to take the opportunity to build what I thought was the most primitive, MANly, badass training facility that I could ever conceive! And for as long as I’ve been open (about two years now), people are adopting my philosophy in training and in life by refusing to accept the B.S. that most of the gyms and the politically correct pansies are feeding them. They are manning up and bringing MANhood back into our estrogen-laiden society.
Ultimately, Team SWOLE Patrol and the MAN Cave are put in place as a rallying cry for the men that are unwilling to accept anything but the best from themselves and others. So far it’s working, but we won’t stop until EVERYBODY joins the revolution!!!

MP: How is the new gym doing and where is it located?
SP: The new gym is going great! We just moved in about five weeks ago and given the fact that we always have some of our athletes running the sleds, carrying the kegs, or flipping the tires outside in our parking lot, there is a lot of talk going around town. Just the other day, one of my clients told me he overheard one of his patients talking about this new gym with crazy people doing crazy things outside. I don’t care if people think we’re crazy! As a matter of fact, I WANT them to think we’re crazy! Say what you want, but what we’re doing sticks out and is getting better results than these clown-ass trainers who preach about functional training. These guys can continue to do step-ups on a Bosu Ball, while my athletes do the standard powerlifts and strongman. Becuase let me tell you, the balance they build on those won’t save them on the field when an avalanche of size, strength, speed and manhood comes barrelling down on them in the form of one of my SWOLEdiers! If the sound of that is music to your ears, then you too can train at the MAN Cave in preparation for world domination...

Elite S/C

1221 W. Cass St.

Tampa, FL 33606

MP: What type of equipment does your gym have?
SP: I was very meticulous when it came to designing and outfitting my gym. I always thought that if you wanted a top-tier facility, that you would invest in only the best equipment. Now, those that know me best know that I’m not an ass kisser and will tell it like I see it, but I gotta pucker up when it comes to the service elitefts™ provided when it came time to outfit my gym with the most badass, durable and effective equipment money could buy! When people walk through the doors, the first thing they notice is the lack of what they have become accustomed to training at a typical gym.

  1. We don’t have treadmills...we have Prowlers!
  2. We don’t have Smith Machines...we have Collegiate Power Racks
  3. We don’t have leg curl machines...we have Glute Ham Developers and Reverse Hypers
  4. We don’t have chrome spray painted bars...we have EVERY specialty bar EFS carries
  5. We don’t have cables...we have chains and bands

Bottom line is, we have everything you need...and nothing you don’t!!!

MP: Tell us about your MAN Cave MAN Certification that will be held in August?
SP: Over the years of sifting through what works and what doesn’t in my quest to figure out an effective way to increase the size, strength, explosiveness, conditioning, and yes...aesthetics (you know you want to look good too!) of an athlete, I have finally put together what I feel is the best formula for those goals. I have named the training system, and I do stress “system,” the Elite Method for the Meat Headed...
It is the same training I use with ALL of my clients, whether they are competitive athletes or washed up wannabe’s, and has proven to be effective for both regardless of their training experience.
What this certification will do is highlight this system in a way that will not only teach those that are eager to learn how we program, but also learn the methodology, the coaching points for each exercise, and how to cater it for each individual's goals. It will not just be lecture though, it will be extremely hands-on. I always believed that the best way to learn how to swim was to just jump in the water, so the same applies to training.
That’s why it’ll focus just as much on actually going through the movements as learning about them in the classroom.
The point’s we will touch on will be

  • Programming
  • Lifting form (powerlifts, olympic lifts, and strongman lifts)
  • Dynamic warm-ups
  • Postural assessments
  • Movement screening
  • Plyometrics
  • Supplemental and accessory lifts
  • Accommodated resistance
  • “Brick Shit House Training” (MAN Cave conditioning work)
  • Performance Based vs. Aesthetics Based Nutrition

Then again, it is put on by the SWOLE Patrol, so the end of the day is only the beginning of the fun! That will be left untold and will only be for those that have the balls to come! I’ll say this though, everyone will go home with an expansive amount of knowledge and AT LEAST one story they can’t share with certain loved ones!

MP: Do you train other athletes, besides strongman competitors?
SP: Absolutely! Although competitive strongman is my passion, and I do have some guys that train specifically for it, most of the clients that I train see it as a means to the ends for other goals. Many of my clients are high school and college-level football players, so obviously their ultimate goal isn’t to train the strongman events to better place in a strongman competition. Rather, they view it as more of a different and exciting new mode of exercise that will enhance their performance for their given sport. As for my guys that just want to get swole, their ability to compete in sports has long passed, but their desire to compete, whether with themselves or others, is still there. So, I’ve found that using strongman is a great way to foster competition. And I’m sure everyone will agree that competition brings out the intensity and hard work needed to reach your goals in a faster more efficient manner.

MP: If you were training a bodybuilder, would you add strongman training into their workout program?
SP: Why not?! If you look at one of the primary goals of bodybuilding, it would be to build as much size and density as possible. If you look at the movement patterns that strongman training is composed of, they are all lifts that incorporate multiple muscle groups and will stimulate growth in all the areas that bodybuilders are desperate to build. Let’s look at what it takes to be a successful strongman competitor and relay the training results you will get that will directly carry over into bodybuilding...

  • Strongmen have to be able to deadlift a lot of weight for as many reps as possible...this will build a ton of size and density in your back!
  • Strongmen have to be able to press a lot of weight overhead for as many reps as possible...this will build a ton of size in not just your shoulders, but again...in your back as well!
  • Strongmen have to be well-conditioned to place well in the medley portion of the competition...this style of training increases your resting metabolic rate tremendously, which will help get you ripped without losing muscle! (Does the boring cardio they do on the treadmill or the elliptical do that? Hell no!)

So yeah, if I were to train a bodybuilder, I’d infuse a lot more of the strongman lifts than the putrid and pitiful “isolation” lifts that are watering down all of their routines. So for any of the bodybuilder’s out there, you have an open invite to come and get your SWOLE on at the MAN Cave!

What's in the MAN Cave?

  • 2 Collegiate Power racks
  • 2 Breaker Bench Presses
  • 1 Collegiate Glute Ham Device
  • 1 Reverse Hyper
  • 1 Pull Up/Dip Station
  • 1 Chalk Bowl
  • 3 Adjustable Benches
  • 2 Adjustable Box Squat Benches
  • 2 Box Squat Pads
  • Boards for Bench
  • Bands
  • Chains
  • Safety Squat Bar
  • Spider Bar
  • Mini Cambered Bar
  • Cambered Bar
  • 6 Texas Power Bars
  • 2 Fat Bars
  • 2 Trap Bars
  • 3 Log Press
  • 2 Farmers Walk
  • 2 Yokes
  • 2 Prowlers
  • Banded Deadlift Station
  • Kegs (up to 350 lbs.)
  • Stones (up to 325 lbs.)
  • Loading Platform
  • Tires (from 350-1020 lb)
  • Hurdles
  • Plyo Boxes
  • Kettlebells (up to 88 lbs.)
  • Dumbbells (up to 150 lbs.)
  • Battle Ropes
  • Lifting Blocks
  • Deadlift Jack